What Shape is Your Circle of Friends?

2 Nov

Some women have a circle of friends that they’ve known forever, but my circle looks more like a dot-to-dot with lines zigzagging across the page, reflecting the stages of my life.

I have always found it difficult to have a large circle of friends like I see portrayed in movies. You know the ones, the groups of five or six women who sit around, drinking wine, talking about everything, knowing each other for years. Now that I’m older, and a bit wiser, I know why that’s never worked for me; I’m a mom, I move a lot, my life is constantly evolving and I have a variety of interests. It is because of these things that I am grateful for my not so circular circle of friends.

Friendships come in all different shapes, sizes, interests and ages. Some women that I am honored enough to have as friends are 10-30 years older than I am. They are wise and caring and have helped me develop into a strong mother as they encourage me with every new stage of child rearing and they continually strengthen me as a woman. Other friends are mothers with children of all different ages. We support each other with words of encouragement and celebrate milestones no matter how big or small. I have work friends with whom I discuss new business plans over endless cups of coffee. And there are women who have entirely different philosophies about life that I enjoy as friends because there is so much to learn from conversation and friendly debates. I even have friends who are men. They are terrific advisors and excellent in providing a different perspective to my life.

But not all friendships are perfect. Some friendships that seem so strong wither and fade away leaving us with broken hearts but fond memories. Other friendships can be incredibly toxic and are best removed from our life. But, even these friendships can make you strong.

My mother-in-law always says, “If you have one friend from every stage of your life, you’ve had a good life.” So, the next time you feel that your circle of friends is more like a dot-to-dot, remember that each of the friendships that criss-crossed the chapters of your life, have made you the woman and mother you are today.

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